41: Whatever the present moment contains

Dagnabit. January and February have been what you might call rocky. Weather patterns returning to historical norms and some record breaking cold triggered the worst flare I’ve had since being diagnosed with CRPS. I started a series of nerve blocks right when I was starting to get things all lined up at work. And then a dear friend lost her son.

This is the friend that I dropped out of fashion school with. We had to face a nun, back in the stone ages, you had to withdraw from school in person. To make it worse, she was pregnant and I was miserable. So, we went together. She gave birth to a beautiful baby boy a few months later, I worked my butt off to get in to U of I.

He was diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder. I was taking the world by storm. I chose my path. She was given hers.

If there is anyone who embraced this wisdom, it was Tall Molly. Her sweet baby boy had a rough start in life. He had unexplained seizures, they were sure he was going to die. With the heart of a saint and the temperament of a warrior she fought for that boy. He beat the odds and made it to 3. Then to 5.

He turned 10 just two weeks ago. He passed away this week.

That sweet boy was not what she had planned, but she found so much joy in him. And while his loss is not one that can easily be lived through, all the moments before, she showed just how to embrace life. The good and the bad. The easy and the difficult.

Someday, dear Molly, I hope that I can face adversity with the strength and grace that you did. I hope that I can embrace this wisdom the way you did these past 10 years. And I hope, so very much, that someday the joy he brought you outweighs the sadness you feel now.